You ever wonder if you are where you are supposed to be? If your small amount of time on earth will be remembered? And how the 2 questions intersect? Me too!
When God interrupted our very predictable suburban life with this bulletin... " just in from the throne room... you will now be farmers...", shocked doesn't quite do the emotion justice.
When i have read the words or taught on the passage in Matthew 16:24, where Jesus gave some real clear direction to the disciples..."If anyone wants to follow after me, let him deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me" i don't remember farming ever crossing my mind.
In all the times i've finished studying those scriptures and closed my eyes in prayer speaking out loud "yes Lord i want to follow you", did this picture we are living ever cross my mind, although lots of other things did.
BUT it doesn't really matter does it. Because we are the servants and he is the Master. He doesn't really need our consent, just our obedience.
Even having stated all the above out loud, It doesn't change the burning question inside... how can this move and complete lifestyle makeover (wardrobe too) possibly be His will for our lives right? How can broken fences, mucking stalls, lots of sweaty, wet, cold or hot days, death, smells, dirty hands, and a draining of checkbook on a daily basis be our lot in life? How can this possibly bring Him Glory and be for our best?
Well... here is all i know. I am FOREVER and ETERNALLY grateful to have been invited into this great God sized adventure. It has been hard and fun, painful and enjoyable, memorable and embarrassing, full of tears and frustration and smiles and laughter, overly expensive but forever where we will be! This is His path for our lives and every broken road has led us here. Haven is home. It is our little slice of heaven on earth until we get to the other side.
I am grateful that He is sovereign and good while i am wishy washy and selfish. I am grateful that He sees the end when i can only see what lies immediately ahead. I am grateful He holds the Big picture firmly in His hands while my hands holds all loosely. He led us blindly into our legacy that we didn't even know we wanted. He gave us back years that the locusts had eaten and brought us back together. Glory!
Each day as i look into the eyes of all these God has placed under our care here i see a little more of the Love of our Father. Each is seeking care and TLC from us their master. Each is wanting so eagerly to please. Each needs companionship, shelter and unbiased love. NEVER have i understood the love of the Father so deeply, intimately and personally. Who knew we could learn so much from the animals, people and lifestyle of farming?!
Crazy huh?! We found our deepest longings and desires filled in the muddy, stinky, dirty wide open fields of Haven Farms! So without knowing or understanding all the pieces of our arrival or days ahead we can say without question... we are in the middle of His will!